さがしものは何ですか?

osusume, arimasu.

[書籍] すごい!人間関係力~人生に成功する人づきあいの方法~

 

おすすめ文

【内容】
本書では、職場、友人、男女、親子、近隣などを念頭において、どうすれば潤滑な人間関係を
築くことができるかを具体例を示しつつ、提言している。以下に、各章毎の内容、印象に残った
点を挙げる。

第1章 人間関係の基本
・非道な行為を批判し、懲らしめることは、社会としては必要だろう。しかし、法に触れたわけでも
 なく、道徳的に批判されるような態度をとったわけでもないのなら、人の悪い面よりいい面を見つ
 つ接しようではないか。というのが、著者の基本的なスタンス。そのほうが、どれほど互いに行き
 やすく、人とつきあいやすく、なおかつ住みやすい世の中になることか。人づきあいは、「粗探し
 より、いいとこ探し」が人間関係の基本である。
・「楽しい仕事」「楽しい人生」とはどのようなものかと考えると、それは仲間や家族と喜びを分かち
 合えるような人生ではないだろうか。そんな楽しい人生を送るためにも、人との出会いは大切
 である。一期一会の思いで、笑顔で接することを心掛けたいものである。
・周りの評価や印象もあるだろうが、それよりも重要なのは自分自身の気持ちである。自分で、
 「私は内気ではない、社交的だ」と思えば、それでもう、半分以上は内気ではなくなったも同然
 である。

第2章 なぜキレるのか?苦情を言うのか?そのときの対処法
・キレる人はどうして増えてきたのだろうか。いろいろな見方があるだろうが、最も大きな原因は
 コミュニケーション不足だと思う。日ごろの挨拶や会話のキャッチボールの不足がキレる人の
 増加を招いているのではないだろうか。特に、"生身の会話"の減少が問題である。メールの
 やりとりは増えていると思うが、メールでしっかりした人間関係を築くのは、無理というものだ。
・感情にまかせる言動は、人間らしいとはあまりいえない。少なくとも品性に欠ける行為である。
 では、言葉を知るにはどうしたらよいのでしょうか。それには、1にも2にも本を読むことです。
 読書に励んで、本から言葉を拾うこと。あるいは、人と会話をしていて、「これは!」と思う
 言葉に出会ったときに、その言葉をメモすることである。
・著者自身がキレそうになったときに、実践している対策は2つ。1つは、席を外すこと。もう1つ
 は、ほかの誰かを同席させること。
・苦情や意見は、企業にとってのチャンスであるとともに、そこで働く個人にとっても、信頼を得た
 り、人間関係を深めたりすることのできる絶好の機会である。

第3章 仕事関係でのコミュニケーション その1
・電話でのコミュニケーションのポイントは、「いかに会っているように話すか(話せるか)」である。
 会って話すときは、言葉だけでなく、顔や手も使うことができる。つまり、言葉に加え、表情や
 身振り手振りも気持ちを伝える手段として駆使することができる。会っているように話すとは、
 1つにはそうした表情や身振りなども相手に伝わるように話すことである。また、口調もより
 自然に、合って話しているときに近づけることが大切。そのためには、受話器に話しかけて
 いるのではなく、目の前に相手がいると考えて話すとよい。

第4章 仕事関係でのコミュニケーション その2
・著者は、「内田雅章朝食会」という会を月に2回ほど開いている。メンバーは朝の7時頃に、
 銀座や赤坂のホテルのレストランに集まり、直食を食べながら、この1週間どんなことをして
 きたか、1人ずつ話していく。この会の目的は3点ある。①朝の時間の有効活用、②モチ
 ベーションアップ、③非日常に自分を置いて、日常を観察すること。
・皆さんも一歩踏み込んだ交流会に参加したり、あるいは自分たちでそうした交流会をつくっ
 たりして、切磋琢磨し合える場に身をおいてみてはいかがだろうか。自らの成長と新たな
 発見を望む人にとっては、きっと貴重な場になるであろう。

第5章 友人関係をうまくやる
・著者の考える「友人」とは、「仕事上のやりとりを除いて、自発的に行動を共にとりたいと
 思う人」である。
・著者がいつもモチベーションを高く保てている秘訣は、落ち込むこともあるが、復活が早い
 から。例えば、「落ち込んでも、サウナに入ったら復活する」と決めている。また、「朝起きる
 と、充電完了!エンジン全開!!」とも決めている。自ら「定義づけ」することによって、
 迷いをなくし、即断即決しやすい環境をつくりだしている。
・初対面でも、あるいは初対面だからこそ、「この人と、親しくさせてほしい」と直感で思うこと
 がある。その場合には、その直感を大切にした方がよい。そして、もしその相手が自分を
 誘ってくれたなら、可能な限り、その誘いに応えるべきである。そうすることで、あなたとその
 人との距離感はより一層縮まり、信頼関係はより深まることとなる。

第6章 酒の席、合コンでどうするか?
第7章 親、親戚、近所とうまくつきあう
・親と子の関係が人間関係の大元であるる。すべの人間関係はここからスタートしている。
 しかし、現代人は、案外この関係をおろそかにしているのではないだろうか。
・身近な人との関係を大切にできない人が、友人や会社の同僚、取引先やお客さんを
 大切にできるとはとても思えない。まずは身近な人との関係を大切にすることから、すべて
 の人間関係は始まる。



【感想&気づき】
【気づき&感想】お薦め度:★★★★(5段階評価)
著者の内田氏の本は、ご自身の意見をスパっと言い切っている部分が心地よい。今回の

人間関係に関する本でも、仕事上の嫌らしい人脈術とは違って、自らを成長させるために、
どのようなスタンスで人間関係を構築していくべきかという根っこの部分が書かれている。
私自身も、社外の場に出向くようにはしているが、波があって、少し疲れてしまう時期がある。
けれども、この本を読むことで、改めて、積極的に自身を成長させるために、切磋琢磨し
合える場に出ていかなければいけないと感じた。また、自らそういった場をつくり出すことにも
取り組んでいきたいと思う。


【お知らせ】
アウトプットで自己成長!!
http://ameblo.jp/smile-coach

こんなあなたにおすすめ

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基本情報

PHP研究所 − 内田 雅章

投稿者

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最終更新

2008-08-23 09:04:44
 

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